Navigating by Stars

Stepping Out of the Past

2011-03-19T19:09:00.000-07:00

As I searched for information on David Vader's capture, I only considered the event as "his capture." A few weeks ago, I learned there were many soldiers captured on September 26, 1863. Out of 18 men, only four survived: David Vader, James E. Wilkins, Charles Goss and Llewellyn Worthly.

Since April 2011 marks the beginning of the Civil War's sesquicentennial, it seems appropriate to post the names of all the soldiers from the 112th Regiment of Illinois Volunteer Infantry who were captured on September 26, 1863.

David Vader
James E. Wilkins (Captain of I Company)
Cephas B. Hunt
Charles T. Goss
Llewellyn Worthy
John Liken*
George Hatton*
Charles F. Barber*
Lewis R. Colby**
Thomas H. Daring*
Watson B. Ford**
Frank Gurstung**
James Hart*
Edward Hunt***
John Peterson*
Robert O Serene*
Jefferson Snyder**

*Died in Andersonville, GA
**Died in Danville, VA
***Died in Florence, SC

The Call Will Come

2010-09-27T18:48:00.001-07:00

On ground of remembrance, I wrote about what I've discovered about my calling "Remember them." However, there's another type of call I experienced this year. Gail Sheehy describes The Call in the first chapter of her new book, Passages in Caregiving - Turning Chaos into Confidence.

"Then you get The Call, the one that changes your life, diverting all your hope and energy into an entirely different priority." (p. 11)

"The question is not if you will be called to act as a family caregiver - that call will come to most of us at some point - but how you will respond." (p. 21)

"...This interplay between two of life's greatest passages can become whatever your make it - a time for regretting or for rejoicing. Seen as the latter, it opens up the greatest possibilities for true intimacy and reconnection at the deepest level. The sharing of strengths and vulnerabilities, without shame, fosters love. ... We can become better than our younger selves." (p. 13)

If you are a caregiver or if you're intuitive (or not in denial) to know the role may be in your future, be proactive and read Passages in Caregiving - Turning Chaos into Confidence by Gail Sheehy. She writes about the eight turnings in the labyrinth of caregiving. The first turn is Shock and Mobilization that begins with The Call. She provides strategies during each turn and mentions some resources.

Here are a few notable websites:

Next Step In Care provides easy-to-use guides to help family caregivers and health care providers work closely together to plan and implement safe and smooth transitions for chronically or seriously ill patients. Transitions are moves between care settings, for example, hospital to home or rehab facility, or the start or end of home care agency services. Because transitions are often rushed, miscommunication and errors can occur. Next Step in Care materials emphasize careful planning, clear communication, and ongoing care coordination.

National Alliance for Caregiving is a non-profit coalition of national organizations focusing on issues of family caregiving. Alliance members include grassroots organizations, professional associations, service organizations, disease-specific organizations, a government agency, and corporations.

Caregiver Services Program provides "Powerful Tools for Caregivers," a program at Legacy Good Samaritan Medical Center that's mentioned in Sheehy's Acknowledgments.

Collecting links

2010-08-18T15:58:00.001-07:00

For now, recording links I find. Check out groundofremembrance.com for the interconnected discoveries.

The roster for Company I of 112th Illinois Infantry. The roster identifies soldiers who died at Andersonville.

Wesley Phillips was the Assistant Surgeon for the 112th.

Home page for Illinois in the Civil War.

Photos of Illinois soldiers, organized by regiment,

Quiet Gardens*

2010-06-24T18:17:00.000-07:00

"The Quiet Garden Trust is the brainchild of the Rev. Philip Roderick, a Welshman who grew up steeped in a Celtic tradition where the spiritual and the sacred are celebrated not only in churches and chapels but also in places of earthly power and beauty: in woodlands and groves, on seashores and wind-swept cliffs. He is someone who hears the pearly song of the seas, finds direction in the wind running through the leaves...

Says Roderick, "There is a sensuality to nature as well as an asceticism; there are teachings on birth and death. Nature is nurturing, educational, challenging. It is a profound place of presence, of passivity and activity, giving and receiving. Nature can be a priest to me, ministering grace and goodness, and I can be a priest to nature, ministering love and care. We can draw each other back to God."

...We create gardens because we are called to be co-creators with God, designers of places to fulfill the human quest for wholeness and well-being. The earth heals, so even when we are just sitting in the garden, we are touching the earth and being embraced by God's activity."

Quiet Gardens are as much concept as place, a respite from the world of action and noise, where the focus is on finding the beauty in stillness.

LINKS:
History of the Quiet Garden Movement
Quiet Gardens in the US

*ARTICLE SOURCE: A Quiet Garden by Louise Danielle Palmer, Spirituality & Health, March/April 2004

Soul Care

2010-06-21T08:50:00.000-07:00

Found the book, "Parting - A Handbook for Spiritual Care Near the End of Life" at Cyrano's Bookshop in Highlands, NC. What a sweet little shop that surprises with its unexpected offerings. I wasn't looking for books on the subject of spiritual care near the end of life, but there it was. I have the feeling the book will serve as another stepping stone (or clue) to the "new career."

From the book, "Parting":
"The best way to improve spiritual care for the dying is to improve it for the living. All too often, the day-to-day business of life gets in the way of the inner life."

Improve spiritual care for the living. The continuing story of RESURGAM has proven to me that its possible. Spiritual care is defined in Parting as "soul care, helping the human spirit in its search for peace."

RESURGAM is a story about soul care in action. Little did I know in 1987 when I responded to the call 'Remember them" that I would explore the boundaries and terrain of soul care. This has been my discovery while writing about war & peace, life & death, and remembrance.

Notable Links

2010-06-13T17:27:00.001-07:00

I haven't found any direct links to David Vader but these are notable for anyone who might be interested in Iowa history or the Civil War:
Civil War Diaries and Letters
Iowa History - Iowa's genealogy website
Iowa Heritage Digital Collections - Iowa history from Iowa libraries and museums

The Search for David Begins

2010-06-01T16:22:00.000-07:00

Within an hour after deciding to search for David Vader, I expanded my search beyond Andersonville and found on Googlebooks:
History of the 112th Regiment of Illinois Volunteer Infantry: In the Great war of the Rebellion - 1862-1865
By Bradford F. Thompson (Late Captain in the Regiment)

About the search for David Vader

A Day for My Father

2010-05-19T15:35:00.000-07:00

Capturing the Unmeasurable

2010-05-10T17:24:00.000-07:00

Rereading The Art of Pilgrimage by Phil Cousineau and found this:
"...Most tourists now "draw" with their cameras. The question of the day is: Does the average person see as well with the camera as with a pencil in the hand? Hannah Hinchmann's book "A Trail Through Leaves" is an inspirational work to encourage the practice of rendering the world around you - either at home or on the road - by hand.
... She teaches that before you can "capture the unmeasurable, first you have to notice it." ...
As artist Betty Edwards reminds us, "Drawing isn't the problem, seeing is the problem."
The problem of seeing what? The beauty made visible by seeing with the eyes of the heart."

Moment Captured

2010-04-20T18:16:00.000-07:00

Wisteria. Spring. Evening.
An ending approaches on April 10.

Sky of Remembrance

2010-04-05T08:38:00.000-07:00

Do you need to know what it was to appreciate the beauty of what you see?

Discovery's contrails - after the launch.

Discovery is downrange. Look closer and you can see the contrails.

Moments after Discovery's lift-off on April 5.

Surfing

2010-03-17T15:58:00.000-07:00

Found the quotes posted here in the book Surfing by Nancy Schiffer in cooperation with San Fransisco Airport Museums.

"But tomorrow, oh tomorrow, I shall be out in that wonderful water, and I shall come in standing up... And if I fail tomorrow, I shall do it the next day, or the next. Upon one thing I am resolved: the Snark will not sail from Honolulu until I too, wing my heels with the swiftness of the sea, and become a sunburned, skin peeling Mercury." --- Jack London 1907

"How would you like to stand like a god before the crest of a monster billow, always rushing to the bottom of a hill and never reaching its base, and to come rushing in for half a mile at express speed, in a graceful attitude, of course, until you reach the beach and step easily from the wave to strand. "--- Duke Kahanamoku

Sue Monk Kidd

2010-02-28T19:22:00.001-08:00

Found her latest book, a collaborative effort with her daughter: Traveling With Pomegranates. What caught my eye in the Table of Contents was their trip to Turkey. Checked out the book for that reason alone but was pleasantly surprised. The book comprises of their trips to Greece, Turkey, and France over ten years.

In the book, Sue Monk Kidd mentions a quote from Thomas Merton, "Merton introduced me to what he called the True Self, referring to the God spark or divine nature in the human soul that's described by practically every mystical tradition in the world. If we could glimpse it, he wrote, "we would see these billions of points of light coming together..."

That's what I began to see with Alpha Company (especially after publishing the book). Many points of light expanding exponentially.

Time at the Heart of Design

2010-02-15T17:04:00.000-08:00

Excerpt from "How to Make the Most of What You've Got" by Daryl Beyers:
"Good gardens... grow from the observation of opportunities that present themselves over time. By learning to embrace what is best in a landscape and responding well to whatever challenges there are, a garden plan has every chance of success...
Impressed by the mature beauty exhibited by a garden 60 years in the making, I looked around and recognized a design developed through observation and thoughtful decisions. This process, which I have thought to garden-design students, places time at the heart of design.
Time makes landscape gardening a dynamic endeavor. It is also what gives gardens therei sense of pwer: the power to shape life and land beyond the scope of ordinary ages. Peggy & Nicholas Abkhazi used time to observe, embrace and respond to their landscape. The result of this long labor of lover is a garden that demonstrates a sense of belong with the land upon which it was made."

SOURCE:
Fine Gardening, May-June 2007

LINKS:
Abkhazi Garden featured in Victoria Lodging
Abkhazi Garden featured in Hort-Pro Online

Where Will Sophy Go?

2010-02-10T07:54:00.000-08:00

Keep uncovering Venice instead of Istanbul. (This would be story 3.)

Quick Note

2010-02-07T18:32:00.000-08:00

Still reading about the Byzantine Empire.

Be a Finder

2010-02-02T09:32:00.000-08:00

Must share this. All words by Wayne Muller:
"You have been a seeker for so long," I said. "Why not become a finder? At this stage of your life, what if you imagined you were ready to let go of seeking, and begin finding?"
She remained silent for a time, a look of deep confusion on her face, her head slightly tilted, as if she were trying to hear a sound far away. Then, suddenly, a laugh exploded from deep in her belly. A finder! What a delight! How could she have never imagined it before? She and always been so focused on the search, she had never taken time to rejoice in the blessing, the gift of finding.

SOURCE: Sabbath - Finding Rest, Renewal, and Delight in Our Busy Lives by Wayne Muller (page 202).

Found in a Folder

2010-01-31T18:53:00.001-08:00

"Healing occurs as we express ourselves genuinely, by saying in some way what the past has been. In expressing how it was and is, we make ourselves the witness - one who sees rather than one who has merely been tossed about by passing events."

"Giving ourselves to serve others is a fitting antidote to what most diminishes our humanity - the refusal to care. "

"...whether it is a small gesture or a grand project, the essence is always serving others and the truth as you see it."

SOURCE: Healing from the War by Arthur Egendorf

I Remember

2010-01-28T08:10:00.002-08:00

The Challenger (STS-51-L) Crew:

Francis R. (Dick) Scobee, Michael J. Smith,Judith A. Resnik, Ronald E. McNair,
Ellison S. Onizuka, Gregory B. Jarvis, and Christa McAuliffe

Go At Throttle Up

2010-01-28T08:10:00.001-08:00

"Challenger, go at throttle up," broadcast over the radio as we drove down Park Avenue in Winter Park, Florida.
"Roger, Go at throttle up."
I pulled into the parking place on the street, and told Joy, "I've always heard you can see a launch in Orlando." This would be my first opportunity to see if that was true. I stepped on the curb and searched for a clearing between the live oak branches.
There it was.
The sight was nothing like the hundreds of launches I had seen standing on the beach (or basically, in the backyard of the Space Center). I knew a launch sequence like clockwork and nothing looked right. The contrails were snaking wildly out of control. There was a large orange glow instead of a bright star ascending into the heavens. Everything looked wrong from here in Winter Park.
"Did it blow up?" Joy asked me.
"No, it's just a different angle." I turned away. I didn't want to know the truth.

***
The explosion occurred 73 seconds into the flight as a result of a leak in one of two Solid Rocket Boosters that ignited the main liquid fuel tank. The crew members of the Challenger represented a cross-section of the American population in terms of race, gender, geography, background, and religion. The explosion became one of the most significant events of the 1980s, as billions around the world saw the accident on television and empathized with any one of the several crew members killed. *

Once I faced the truth, I would spend countless hours watching, reading and researching why the Challenger explosion occurred.

*SOURCE: The Crew of the Challenger Shuttle Mission from NASA

Duncan

2010-01-25T18:12:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite photos of 'Duncan' heading into the fog surrounding the Glastonbury Tor in England (1992).

Italy

2010-01-12T06:56:00.001-08:00

Italy continues to catch my attention. In a bookstore last night, there was a flyer promoting a beginner Italian class. Along with the flyer were 3x5 cards sitting on a counter, printed with the call to action: "Discover Authentic Italy." I picked up the card. NadasItaly.com

Ideas & Stars

2010-01-11T17:53:00.001-08:00

Ideas are like stars, you will not succeed in touching them with your hands. But like the seafaring man on the desert of waters, you choose them as your guides, and following them you will reach your destiny. - Carl Schurz, 1829-1006

I found the words from Carl Schurz in an old 2-inch blue spiral notebook that contains gathered observations and quotes from 1992-1994. Schurz's words seem to best describe what navigating by stars is all about. I have no idea where I found the quote, but I picked it up and noted it on January 19, 1994.

Rest

2010-01-10T16:48:00.000-08:00

Sub-freezing outside - a great reason to stay inside and read. Found these words: Only at rest can we hear what we have not heard before, and be led to what is most deeply beautiful, necessary, and true. - Wayne Muller

Monte Piana/Piano, Italy

2010-01-02T13:48:00.001-08:00

Surprisingly, Italy is coming into focus more than Turkey. Yesterday it was the Dolomites, which includes Monte Piana (or Monte Piano) - an open air WWI museum. (I really don't actively look for battlefields, but I seem to find them.) The open air museum consists of trenches, tunnels and emplacements located on the top of the mountain. Monte Piana's shape and position provide a spectacular 360 degrees view of the mountains around Auronzo di Cadore and Cortina d'Ampezzo - Tre Cime di Lavaredo, Paterno, Cadini di Misurina, Sorapiss, Cristallo, Croda Rossa ecc. - and over the Lake of Misurina at its feet.

Friends of the Dolomites
From their website: Monte Piano rises like a barrier across the Höhlenstein Valley. It was located only 12 km from the main railway in Toblach and the Puster Valley, which was the important re-supply line for the Dolomite Front. The mountain's summit ridge runs in a northeast direction and consists of two knolls (2,301 m / 2,325 m) divided by a depression or saddle called Forcella dei Castrati. The plateau's size allowed for the movement of large numbers of soldiers during battles. When the Italians were thwarted in their efforts to gain access to the Puster Valley via the Höhlenstein Valley they attempted a breakthrough over the Monte Piano. The result was two years of continuous stationary trench warfare and very large numbers of casualties. Both sides created extensive networks of trenches, fortifications, and other positions on their respective sides.

Previous restoration efforts on the "Paths of Peace" resulted in an increased interest, awareness and enthusiasm for this period of history. The idea was born to restore the positions on a mountain of both historical significance and great scenic beauty, and make an open-air museum out of the entire mountain warfare battlefield. To begin with, all the paths, which had previously linked each of the opponent's own plateau trails together, were united in one large circuit path. The trails leading up to the plateau from various sides were also reactivated at the same time. 30 different noteworthy military features were restored to what they would have looked like in 1917.

NOTES:
Summit Post on the Sexten Dolomites.
Hotel Waldheim for hikers. The Helm cableway is next to the hotel.

Books Arrive

2009-12-29T14:30:00.000-08:00

The books: Lost to the West - The Forgotten Byzantine Empire That Rescued Western Civilization by Lars Brownsworth and Sailing from Byzantium - How a Lost Empire Shaped the World by Colin Wells.

I read the final chapter 'The Eternal Emperor' from Lost to the West by Lars Brownsworth. There was a young Hungarian, Urban, who was a canon specialist - he designed canons. He offered his services to the Byzantines but when they ran out of money, he hopped over to work for Mehmed. Mehmed wanted Urban to create cannons that would bring down Constantinople's wall. Urban created the canons for Mehmed. A fact I didn't know. ... Now to the beginning of the book.

Someday... Cinque Terre

2009-12-28T15:46:00.000-08:00

Board a train in Zurich, pass through the Alps via the Gotthard Tunnel, travel along the Italian coast, to La Spezia. Hop on the local train in La Spezia to Riomaggiore and explore the five villages.

Garden Side Trip

2009-12-26T13:53:00.001-08:00

I wanted to learn a little bit more about the Valley of the Roses in Bulgaria and also more about Isparta, Turkey. I landed on 1000 Fragrances - a blog by a fragrance historian and writer in Paris.
Saw a post Annick Goutal on 1000 Fragrances and read the review about the new fragrance Ninfeo Mio. The fragrance sounds interesting but photos of the Ninfa gardens included in the post are stunning. The gardens are located on the old ruins of Ninfa in Italy. Definitely adding the Ninfa gardens to my discovery list.

The Valley of the Roses

2009-12-26T07:52:00.000-08:00

What a surprise. The Valley of the Roses is about 30 miles wides and 50 miles long and located in Bulgaria. On either side are mountain ranges. The Damask rose 'Kazanlik' is grown in Bulgaria, Turkey and Iran for essential oils, and was named after Kazanuluk, the principal town in Bulgaria, in the Valley of the Roses. ... [The Valley of the Roses] is a magical place, with pure light and pure water from the mountains. In early June, the wild flowers make a rich carpet and enormous, straight walnut trees testify to the lack of pollution. The rose fields are vast, and the roses stay productive for twenty years. They are planted in wide rows and receive little or no care in terms of pruning or spraying.*

As for Turkey, the place for the manufacture of attar (essential rose oil) in Turkey is Isparta.

*SOURCE: Gardening with Old Roses by John Scarman

The Holiday's Light

2009-12-24T20:15:00.000-08:00

Passing it on.

Someday... A New Research Trip

2009-12-22T10:43:00.000-08:00

Definitely Istanbul and Ephesus, and perhaps ...

SOURCE: Turkey Travel Directory 2006 picked up at Epcot.

Why Turkey?

2009-12-22T10:33:00.000-08:00

Why would Sophy go to Turkey? The discovery process began last night after posting "Someday." A search on two connected words offered up a few options on google books, and I landed on a particular page in The History of the Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire by Edward Gibbon.

My discovery: Byzantine Empire. I hadn't even considered looking that far back in the past.

Someday

2009-12-21T17:38:00.000-08:00

From The Illustrated Discovery Journal by Sarah Ban Breathnach: "What do you dream of doing someday? Writing a novel? Producing a movie? Living in an artist's loft? Driving cross-country? We all have daydreams we cling to, even though we often wonder if we'll ever fulfill them."

I don't know when my sister gave me The Illustrated Discovery Journal. The copyright is October 1999. It's possible that it's been on my bookshelf for nearly ten years. I finally picked it up a few weeks ago when inspiration was elusive. I read the chapter on 'someday' this weekend.

My 'someday' arrived. Dream fulfilled in 2009: the day I held the advance copy of RESURGAM in my hands. So much of my life got wrapped up in the story and the research. It drove most every decision I've made for so many years.

I released the weight of the book's creation when my someday arrived. That was liberation. I realized today I'm holding on to new weight. Holding on... not wanting the gate to close on my achieved someday. But that someday was yesterday. Awareness: Another season ends. What timing - on the shortest day of 2009. My someday arrived and its done. The next part of the story has already unfolded. There's a new level of remembrance to uncover. There are new 'somedays' but most importantly there's today.

What I can do now:
Start gathering research on Turkey to determine why Sophy must go there.
Research gardens around the world.
Begin mapping out a digital storytelling plan.
Explore new connections.
Enjoy today.

Winter Solstice

2009-12-21T13:08:00.001-08:00

Winter begins. As my yoga teacher, Sarah, stated, "The stars shine brightest when the sky is darkest."

Success

2009-12-20T09:03:00.001-08:00

The real moment of success is not the moment apparent to the crowd.
- George Bernard Shaw

Holding on to the Gate

2009-12-17T06:58:00.000-08:00

This photo at Biltmore made me laugh because it illuminated a truth. The new path has been beckoning... and I want the gate to remain open.

When this photo was snapped, I was thinking 'this gate is really heavy' and how I wished it would just stay open. When I started to let go, the gate started to close so I couldn't step off the stairs. I'm on the best side for me, but I'm not moving. Stuck. Not able to do what I want to do and not allowing the gate to close.

The weight of the gate was nearly pushing me out onto the path. "Go!" "Move on!" "Get on with it!"

A First at Biltmore

2009-12-15T18:39:00.000-08:00

I usually visit Biltmore during spring and summer, and its always too hot to spend any time in the conservatory. Usually we don't bother and head to the azalea gardens. December is definitely the time to appreciate the greenery in the conservatory.

Canyon of Dreams

2009-12-15T16:47:00.000-08:00

Spied Canyon on Dreams - The Magic and The Music of Laurel Canyon by Harvey Kubernik on the new non-fiction book shelf at the library. Living in Southern California as a kid, Laurel Canyon was part of 1969's terrain. We were aware of its existence while in elementary school although it was over twenty miles away.

I checked out the book to see Laurel Canyon from a new perspective. Enjoyed reading the narrative's - particularly Graham Nash on his song "Our House." One ordinary moment transforms into a song:

"'Our House' was the house with Joni. It was on Lookout Mountain. It was owned by Joni and still is...
...She passed a small antique store and saw a small beautiful vase in the window... She does not spend a lot of money frivolously. It was expensive then. About $150 and she loved it.
...She put it on the table. And I said, "You know what? Why don't you put some flowers in there and I'd light a fire." Because it was one of those Los Angeles mornings where its not quite raining but it's cold and damp and stuff. And so I'd lit the fire and said, 'What a fuckin' ordinary moment that was. But wait a second. We have these ordinary moments and this one I want to celebrate.' So it was one of the only times when she was putting flowers in the vase that she wasn't at the piano. By the time she'd finished making this beautiful flower arrangement and the fire was ready to go, the song was born."
...a couple of stained-glass ornaments in the window, which were the jewels that I was talking about in the song. The piano was a small dark Steinway. Maybe five and a half feet long. I became a better songwriter there because I was free. I was free of all the silly stuff with The Hollies and I was in a brand new place that was exciting. I was hanging out with David and Stephen and Joan who were tremendously involved in a new kind of communication. I was on top of the world. And every time I go past that house, I smile."

Tea or Milk

2009-12-15T06:03:00.000-08:00

This weekend my sister and I were discussing our elementary school years in California. Our California friends considered us "southern" although we were from Florida. It boggled their minds that we drank iced tea instead of milk. This was 1967. As a first grader, I remember thinking, "What difference does it make?" But knew it was all about differentiation --- what sets you apart can either be good or bad. I loved my years in California. I realized these details of difference were opportunities - to accept or made one susceptible to be shunned from the pack. I started paying attention at an early age to the details and how others used them in their lives. Some people weren't even aware of the details (and the meaning) that created their own lives. Think about that.

Seeking Prayers

2009-12-11T13:50:00.001-08:00

A yearning of the heart.
Thought concentrated.
The irresistible urge of our human nature.

These phrases were some of the definitions Sophy Burnham used to define prayer in an article she wrote, "Sweet Hour of Prayer" in 2004 for Yoga International magazine.

Sophy writes: What is prayer? It is quite simply a yearning of the heart. We don't even have to voice it. It arises from the depths of our anguished suffering or from the power of our love. It erupts, flowers, dies down, and pours forth again. It is thought concentrated and distilled. "With our thoughts we make the world," said the Buddha. If we take this statement literally, then worrying also constitutes prayer.

There's been an increase of prayer in the past few months. My friend, Jan, was diagnosed in October with lymphoma. She posted a request on facebook at the end of October just before she began chemotherapy seeking prayers to destroy the tumors. A yearning of the heart: Healing for Jan, dissolving the tumors into nothing. If you read this post, please say a prayer or have a healing thought for Jan. Thank you.

Silent Night

2009-12-08T06:54:00.001-08:00

This morning I woke up at 5:30 to work on the draft of what I'm calling the "Christmas story." I started it in July (on a dark and stormy night). I remain amazed how characters can teach a writer. (When I was younger, I believed it to be the other way. The writer taught the characters how to live.)

In the story, they're singing "Silent Night." This morning I was reading the lyrics. They remained flat - just words on a page without life. I considered deleting them but decided to keep them in the story because I felt something was missing.

After I had finished the task set out for this morning, I began checking e-mail. "Silent Night" began playing on the radio. I stopped what I was doing and listened. I heard the voices singing, and the music rising and falling - there's the pulse. I realized the answer to my revision is in the music and the voices, not only the words.

To the Heart

2009-12-08T06:48:00.000-08:00

I received a comment from Macrina on a ground of remembrance post (War & Peace) from Dec. 6.
Jean, I'm wondering if part of the reason you found peace after your experience at "the wall" and the journey after that is because YOU DID SOMETHING.... you weren't content to just be sad or even emotional moved...you became a pilgrim to the hearts of the unknown soldier.

The words she wrote clarify the journey that I thought had ended once I published the book, but now am aware is continuing. To the heart. If you look back on these posts during this year, you'll find hints popping into my awareness.

The Beauty of Repetition

2009-12-01T13:43:00.000-08:00

Today I had the opportunity to read once more Thomas Keating's experience at the American Cemetery in Anzio Beach, Italy. The gift of understanding sunk even deeper due to the repetition of reading the words again. This first time I read Keating's experience about walking through the American Cemetery near Anzio Beach, I connected to it. His experience resonated with me due to my collaboration with Phil to write Alpha Company's story and my own journey to Verdun to remember the unknown soldiers. While reading Keating's book, I thought about sending Thomas Keating my book, and a few weeks later did just that.

I shared in my letter a few behind-the-scenes stories that occurred during the researching and writing process. He responded by letting me know he liked the book. A few weeks ago, I felt compelled to share his note with Jerry and Mac (both from Alpha Company). Both responded and Mac's note included this: "One of my uncles fought at Anzio and throughout the war, all the way into Germany. Like me, he was an infantry soldier. We come from a long line of infantry soldiers."

Today a deeper understanding arrived as I reread the words Thomas Keating wrote, "So I waited until the required date approached and entered the Cistercian monastery in Valley Falls, Rhode Island in January 1944. That was about the time of Anzio Beach and the Italian campaign. I entered the monastery specifically to pray for the soldiers and victims of the war."

Mac's uncle was at Anzio Beach in 1944, so Thomas Keating was praying for Mac’s uncle. Mac's uncle probably knew some of the soldiers buried at the American Cemetery near Anzio Beach. The thread of connection from 1944 between Mac's uncle and Thomas Keating was pulled forward in 2009. To you, it may seem like an ethereal untouchable thread from the past. But from where I stand, I see an endless multitude supplying continuity, texture and meaning. Mac's words deserve repeating: "Like me, he [his uncle] was an infantry soldier. We come from a long line of infantry soldiers."

Thomas Keating wrote in his book The Fruits and Gifts of the Spirit, “…everything in human affairs is interconnected. Whatever we do for others now will someday be returned. Even modern physics tells us that, in the physical universe, everything is interconnected.” The bigger picture of interconnectedness provides support and guidance during the transitions from the unknown into the known. They have gone before me and I can learn from them.

Does knowledge of this connection make a difference to you? Maybe not this one connection. Do I think it makes a difference to Mac? That's a definite yes.

Welcome December

2009-12-01T13:21:00.000-08:00

Morning light. Illuminating...
What a difference a day makes.

Good-bye Again

2009-11-30T14:54:00.000-08:00

Catching the early morning light on the last day of November.

Its Not Easy to Follow a Star

2009-11-24T14:58:00.000-08:00

Macrina Wiederkehr writes about stars in her book Seasons of Your Heart: "We are told to follow our star. And yet, for all our romanticizing about the stars, if the truth be known, they sometimes lead us to places we would rather not go. A star marks our paths with light and guides us to deeper insight. With that deeper kind of seeing comes new responsibilities." I've lived that truth. Its not easy to follow a star, but the rewards are abundant and completely unexpected.

Since mid-September I've recognized the active unfolding of the new journey. Posted on the ground of remembrance: “It's a pilgrimage of trust and insight rather than a fugitive run."

What's in the Middle?

2009-11-23T11:58:00.000-08:00

A little bit more about the glimmer line. Early in the process of creating the front cover of RESURGAM, there were two images: 1) RESURGAM in Optima font engraved on the black granite wall; 2) the crated pocked ground near Verdun. Two images with much interplay between life and death, so the question became 'what's in the middle?' There were a few visual ideas - one was a pencil rubbing of RESURGAM on weathered paper - but simplicity won. It seemed the best approach was "the glimmer line" – a subtle presence of light (or golden glow) between the ground and the granite.

RESURGAM’s cover is dark. I struggled with this during the design process. I wanted blue sky reflected in the black granite wall, more life and some beauty, but the sober cover communicates the story. The subtleties - light and life - are present but so easy to miss. They were a part of RESURGAM and are in the story that continues. I knew there would be blue sky in the sequel. That’s what I saw in that magazine clipping – blue sky and blue ocean. What’s in the middle? The horizon - where the earth meets the sky. Another point

The Point of Transition

2009-11-19T17:16:00.001-08:00

I've been creating a card everyday for my friend JP so she knows I'm there everyday supporting her even though I'm thousands of miles away. Today I glanced at a scattering of magazine clippings and the image featured above came into focus. I literally had a flash of revelation. I saw the "glimmer line" in the photo. If you're familiar with the book I wrote or if you're perceptive, you may get it too. I finally saw the similarity - the connector - the point of my transition. Some traction, more than just a sense of momentum... I'm moving on.

Currency

2009-11-17T18:39:00.000-08:00

"New ideas had currency."
That came from the DaVinci - Hand of a Genius exhibit at the High Museum in Atlanta. I can't remember whether I read it or heard it on the audio tour, but it struck me and I scribbled it in my idea notebook. Movement was discussed throughout the exhibit. I liked how currency is used for flow and movement, as well as the acceptance of an idea and its circulation among peers and the younger generation of artists.

For me, this led to another currency avenue to explore: New ideas have their own value or worth - similar to money. An idea is currency (a medium of exchange that's equal to money). If an idea is currency, and you could create value and abundance with ideas, what would you do? How would your life change? This thought process is nothing new, just an idea that gets forgotten.

A First

2009-11-16T07:12:00.003-08:00

RESURGAM's first book club! The first time I attended a book club and was introduced as an author. I enjoyed the dinner (and dessert) that came before the discussion, hearing reader responses in person and the answering questions about specific events, people, places and circumstances.

We talked about "home," Sophy, war and conflicts, the creative process, the interconnectedness that I discovered and my collaboration with Phil.

At the High

2009-11-16T07:12:00.001-08:00

Leonardo da Vinci: Hand of the Genius is at the High Museum in Atlanta. The museum supplies magnifying glasses, which you need to truly appreciate the subtle details in DaVinci's sketches. There are three parts to the exhibit:
The Sculptor - focuses on his sketches for the Sforza Horse
The Student - pairs DaVinci's sketches with sculpture. (Sketches of draped fabric sound rather boring but are astounding; Donatello's Bearded Prophet, which has never been seen outside of Florence, Italy, and the silver relief by Andrea del Verrocchio's The Beheading of St. John the Baptist are both on display.)
The mentor - highlights DaVinci'sinfluence on younger generations of artists.

There was a display of war sculpture I found fascinating but regretfully I didn't note any names in that area and they're not mentioned on the High's website. By the end of the exhibit, I had hit detail overload.

Photo: Sforza Horse. A 26-foot-high re-creation is on display in the outside Sifly Piazza at the High Museum.

Zimzala Peace

2009-11-10T12:25:00.000-08:00

Zimzala has continued to cycle through my thoughts. There's something I experience at the beach that I don't experience anywhere else, and I realized the answer is in zimzala.

Whenever my toes hit the sand, or my eyes catch the first glance of the ocean, or my ears hear the ocean’s waves, 'zimzala peace' greets me. It happens in an instant. I only need to be present to receive it. It's always that easy and effortless.

I experienced 'zimzala peace' at a very young age although I never named it until now. I had easy access to 'zimzala peace' until I was 25 and moved to a landlocked city. The 'zimzala peace' of my youth has transformed into a far different peace. (Ten months into my landlocked life, I discovered the existence of Alpha Company - which led to another different dimension of peace.) Yet, now I know 'zimzala peace' was my foundation. There was nothing I needed to do but be there. Toes in the sand and sunblock on the skin. Peace is in that wide open space. A simple gift anyone can receive.

Zimzala

2009-11-05T12:03:00.000-08:00

Zimzala - "free spirited person who finds peace with sand between his/her toes."
Found this word in the November issue of Coastal Living in an article about Vincent Nuraco, a surfing chef, and his restaurant - Zimzala - in Huntington Beach, CA.

Cows experiencing their own peace on the island of St. Kitts.

Coastal Living

2009-11-03T15:02:00.000-08:00

I received the November issue of Coastal Living today. As I flipped through the pages, I kept thinking I'd love to return to the beach. This isn't a new thought. In October, I stood on the beach and asked 'Why did I ever leave?' (Oh yeah, I remember. Life changed and I moved.)
But now, life is changing again. No more book worries or stories to complete. It's time to create something new.

Goodbye October

2009-10-31T12:27:00.001-07:00

When I flip my wall calendar to November, I’m going to miss this image for October. Twelve avenues radiating from the Arc de Triomphe, which looks like the heart of the star in Paris.

In my experience, that's pretty much the truth. Beneath the massive structure of stone is an eternal flame, and buried underneath the plague is a man, now known as the Unknown French Soldier. He fought in the Battle of Verdun in World War I. He had a heart. Sure, unknown, but still a man with a heart. I like that.

Arc de Triomphe

2009-10-31T09:49:00.001-07:00

From the Armistice Day Parade, 1990. I was there but (honestly) didn't make the connection to WWI or to the Unknown Soldier who was buried there. I was awed to finally be in Paris and wanted to see more of the right bank -- for example, Rue du Faubourg Saint-Honoré.

Made the underground journey to visit the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier in 1998. Little did I know the lessons I'd gain from the World War I soldiers due to traveling to Verdun, France to remember them. The Arc de Triomphe reminds me of them - not just the French soldiers but all of them.

Fall in the Vineyard

2009-10-30T14:09:00.001-07:00

Took a day trip to Shelton Vineyards in NC's Yadkin Valley. My most memorable taste was the PIE experience! Riesling Soaked Sun Dried Cherry and Walnut Pie with Gingersnap and Vanilla ice creams. (Yes, two scoops.) You can find the pie recipe on their website under Harvest Grill Restaurant / Featured Recipes. For lunch, turkey pot pie with sweet potato corn bread.

Drove through Mount Airy and was amazed by the significant Halloween hay displays in the small town. Here's one of many.

Simple Gifts

2009-10-21T05:10:00.000-07:00

'Tis the gift to be simple,
'tis the gift to be free,
'tis the gift to come down where we ought to be...*

*Simple Gifts, 1848 Shaker song by Joseph Brackett

The Gift of Understanding

2009-10-20T17:50:00.000-07:00

October has been the month to read about gifts. Fruits and Gifts of the Spirit by Thomas Keating explores the spiritual gifts - reverence, fortitude, piety, counsel, knowledge, understanding, and wisdom.

In the chapter on the Gift of Understanding, Keating reflected on his uneasiness about entering the monastery in 1941 while his friends were getting drafted and some were getting killed. The Monsignor sensed young Keating's anxiety and stated to him, "This war is not meant for you." Keating writes, "for some reason, his words lodged in my heart and gave me a deep peace, in spite of the fact that I seemed to be a draft dodger to all my relatives, friends, and to myself.

Twenty one years later, he was an abbot attending the Second Vatican Counsel in Rome. One afternoon, several abbots took a break and drove south to Anzio Beach. They stopped at the American cemetery along the way. "As I walked into the cemetery with my monastic companions, I looked at the crosses and stars of David as we made our way down one seemingly endless row of graves. Suddenly I felt as if I was surrounded by friends. It was as if I had come home to a warm welcome among people who greatly loved me. I felt an increasing surge of gratitude that mysteriously surrounded me. ... As I lingered there, I realized unmistakeably that these soldiers were my special friends. It was as if they were saying, "Here is the guy who prayed for us when we were going up the Po Valley to be shot to pieces. Thanks for helping us with your austere life and prayers when we desperately needed them."

He had a flash of recognition and remembered the words, 'This war is not meant for you."
"..The war from which I was spared did not mean I did not have a different kind of war waiting for me. It was as if these friends were saying, "You are now in a war that is going to last even longer than ours. We will help you to get through it." I realize I would owe them much more than they ever owed me."

"...Everything in human affairs is interconnected. Whatever we do for others now will someday be returned.

Excerpts from pages 87-88, Fruits and Gifts of the Spirit by Thomas Keating
(c) 2007 St Benedict's Monastery

The Gift

2009-10-20T17:49:00.000-07:00

The Gift - Creativity and the Artist in the Modern World by Lewis Hyde.
Definitely a book for all artists and anyone interested in the creative process.
(A sampling of chapter titles: The Bones of the Dead, The Labor of Gratitude, The Bond, The Gift Community, and The Commerce of the Creative Spirit.)

Reading Hyde's book helped me understand that RESURGAM is a gift. Sure, the first part of the story is now a book with a start and an end, but the core is a gift, a presence that continues to live and transform.

The Fugitive Run Ends

2009-10-16T05:49:00.000-07:00

A few days ago, I posted "The Fugitive Run" on ground of remembrance.com. Story 2 pulls forward Sophy's predicament and the pattern of her 'fugitive run' finally ends.

Readers have asked, "Are you Sophy?"
My response: No. The idea of Sophy was created because I needed a vehicle in the narrative to 'go there' - to places I didn't have the guts to enter at the time. Sophy was the pioneer. As a writer, I followed Sophy into these places and became the recipient of what she learned. I had to "sit with it" and do my own research to understand the knowledge Sophy received from her experience of stepping into war.

Sophy's fugitive runs have forced me to acknowledge a pattern in my own fugitive runs. Here's what I learned: It's been my experience while researching and writing this unfolding story for twenty-two years that we’re given gifts. Most often they appear in an unexpected forms and through unexpected ways. Because we don’t expect a gift, don’t think we want or need a particular gift, or don’t think we’re worthy of a gift, we reject the gift. (The result, in first person terms, I run from the gift and so I don’t receive the gift that's intended for me. The link is broken because the gift is not received. ) A gift is not always a material item wrapped in a box with a gift enclosure card. Book 2 explores this truth.

Returning to the Beach

2009-10-14T17:36:00.000-07:00

Passing through the remains of a maritime hammock on Cocoa Beach
to get to the wide-open space of the Atlantic ocean.

What's a maritime hammock? It's a non-coniferous forest that occurs on the leeward side of the coastal dune, along the warm southeastern tip of Florida. The canopy is composed of a large variety of tree species of tropical origin. Typical plants include Sea Grape, Paradise Tree, Lancewood, Gumbo-limbo, Strangler Fig, Poisonwood, Saw Palmetto, Beautyberry, Wild coffee, Myrsine, and Marlberry. Migrating birds rely on these forests for food and shelter following trans-oceanic or trans-gulf migrations.

LOCATION: Lori Wilson Park, Cocoa Beach, FL

The Background Comes Into Focus

2009-10-10T11:11:00.000-07:00

This is far from a perfect photograph, but it’s a worthy one. My aim was to capture the WWI identity disk, since it was the first one I have ever seen. Later, I found another ID disk, which probably is more accurate to what the WWI soldier wore, but this was the first one. Although I saw the photograph on the bottom of the display case, I didn’t give it much attention once my focus turned to capturing the identity disk.

When I downloaded the digital photo and saw it for the first time, the WWI soldier caught my attention, not the metal object I had photographed. His presence cannot be missed. The focus shifts from the metal object that identified a life to the unknown WWI soldier that looks out at you and lived a life.

SOURCE: Brevard Veterans Memorial & Center, Merritt Island, FL

The Missing Peace

2009-09-24T08:36:00.001-07:00

While visiting Ken Aptekar's website, I noticed his work is in the traveling exhibition The Missing Peace: Artists Consider the Dalai Lama. Exploring the internal and external presence of war and peace is an on-going theme of Navigating By Stars, so here's an avenue that supports discovery...

OVERVIEW: The Missing Peace. Artists Consider the Dalai Lama is a multi-media art exhibition that brings together 88 respected artists representing 30 countries. With the full life of the Dalai Lama as inspiration, the intention for this project is to shift the world's attention towards peace.
88 contemporary artists.
88 disarming works of art.
88 ways to think about, talk about, experience and create peace.
The project and exhibition title is an play on words — peace may always be elusive, or missing, in our world, but the Dalai Lama consistently shows that dedicating oneself to peace is anything but pointless.

VIDEO: Introduction
VIRTUAL TOUR*: Galleries
*Suggest watching introduction before taking the virtual tour.

Ken Aptekar - Talking to Pictures

2009-09-23T19:01:00.000-07:00

What does Ken Aptekar do?
From Ken Aptekar's website: He puts words and paintings together. He paints on wood panels, then bolts glass sandblasted with texts over them. Using the history of art as his playground, Aptekar toys with paintings from the past, and he connects them to the present. His work implies that paintings are nothing on their own, that they start to mean something only when you start talking back to them.

WEBSITE: Ken Aptekar
I found the catalog from Ken's Aptekar's past exhibit "Talking To Pictures" at the Corcoran Gallery in 1997. Checked out Ken Aptekar's website and found images of his work archived there.

Debussy's Three Nocturnes

2009-09-23T13:14:00.000-07:00

The Lights Dim by Ken Aptekar (1997)
SEE the painting - go to the year - 1997

Ken Aptekar's Text: The lights dim in Henry Ford Auditorium. Walter Poole strides out to the podium in his crisp white shirt and tails. At ten years old, I have to sit up in my seat to see the Maestro's baton. The concert opens with Debussy's Three Nocturnes, and I fold my hands in my lap as the first, Clouds, begins. Motionless, I follow the musical line. The strings take me away. The timpani rumble, the skies darken. A pleading oboe beckons. My head is in the clouds. Suddenly I detect the questionable intonation of a horn. I shift in my seat. A clarinet entrance is late, the harp and flute are out of sync. I'm being pulled down. Between the first and second nocturne, I am dismayed as listeners applaud. I wish I could just be up in the clouds. Debussy composed it after standing on a bridge over the Seine. He wrote "I was leaning on the railing. Some clouds slowly pass... a number of clouds, not too heavy, not too light, some clouds. That is all."

120" x 72" (306cm x 183cm) fifteen panels
After (all in Corcoran Gallery of Art): Albert Bierstadt, The Buffalo Trail: The Impending Storm, 1869 Meindert Hobbema, Wooded Landscape with Figures, 1663 Willem Van de Velde the younger, 1623-1707, Before the Storm 1700 Jan Van Goyen, View of Dordrecht (from the North) 165? Ralph Blakelock, Moonlight, c. 1890 Camille Pissarro, The Louvre, Morning, Rainy Weather, 1900 Charles Daubigny, Landscape, Distant Village, 1870-75

The Darkroom

2009-09-23T13:04:00.000-07:00

Dad is showing me how to develop by Ken Aptekar (1997)
SEE the painting - go to the year - 1997

Ken Aptekar's Text: Dad is showing me how to develop. We're in the darkroom he built for me downstairs. He explains the way to place the negative in the enlarger so the picture won't come out backwards. It's all up to me how big to make my pictures. Often I am all alone in the dark while I'm developing.

60" x 60" (153cm x 153cm) four panels,
oil/wood, sandblasted glass, bolts
After Willem Van de Velde the younger, Before the Storm,
c. 1700, Corcoran Gallery of Art

BIO: Ken Aptekar

Equanimity

2009-09-21T18:35:00.001-07:00

Peace. It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart. - (unknown)

Peace is found on the ground of equanimity.

Making It Transferable

2009-09-18T13:17:00.000-07:00

The Heart of Healing highlights the purpose of Sophy’s journey that began in RESURGAM and continues into the new story.

By the Water's Edge

2009-09-17T13:32:00.000-07:00

Getting away or exploring?

PHOTO: St John, US Virgin Islands

Heart of Healing

2009-09-17T07:08:00.000-07:00

...To bring about peace where before there had been war... (p. 3, Healing into Life and Death by Stephen Levine)

"Sparklers"

2009-09-16T14:29:00.000-07:00

In the 90s, I volunteered at the children's hospital within a major hospital. I got to know many of the oncology patients since their protocol required continued and reoccurring hospital stays. The patients I remember most vividly are Andy, Ronnie, and Kayla.

Kayla was an infant who had leukemia. I still remember the life in her blue eyes. They were 'sparklers' of light.' She stayed in the hospital week after week, and I stopped to see her each Tuesday afternoon. She embodied sweetness. I went to her room one Tuesday to find the crib replaced with a bed and a new patient. That’s how I learned Kayla had died.

After Kayla, other children passed away from terminal illnesses. I found myself backing off instead of reaching out as I did before. Stepping away was not the reason I volunteered at the hospital. I went looking for a book to help me be present for the seriously ill children and their parents. I found Stephen Levine’s Healing Into Life and Death.

Dissolving the Past

2009-09-15T17:37:00.000-07:00

"Living in the past is like living in a cemetery."
-Caroline Myss

A friend called me last week while he was walking through a cemetery in Chicago. He imparted some wisdom he had just read in a book by Caroline Myss that can be best summed up by these two sentences: Retain love, wisdom, goodness, truth as all these energies carry within them the people you love and the memories that make you who you are. Shed everything else that leads nowhere and everything that continually repeats itself but serves nothing at all."

This seemed like a good linkage to the commitment to remember.

PHOTO: Chicago cemetery by IB

Commitment to Remember

2009-09-15T12:56:00.000-07:00

Through his own actions and energy to remember Alpha Company, PW taught me about the commitment to remember. He left a letter to JH at the Vietnam Veterans Memorial that would be published in Shrapnel in the Heart by Laura Palmer. He wrote a letter to his father about the death of GS, his platoon leader. The letter was published in Dear America Letters from Home edited by Bernard Edelman. He wrote poetry and published a book, Rhymer in the Sunset A Combat Soldier's Poetic Perspective of the Vietnam Experience and dedicated it to the memory Alpha Company. These are only a few of the early actions illustrating PW's commitment to remember.

Don't think remembrance is a static memory locked in the past. Attachment is holding on to the past. Remembrance is an generous open hand.

One man's commitment to remember has touched the lives of others. Due to his efforts, I learned about Alpha Company. Three platoon leaders - JH, GS and FR - continue to live in memory. The living veterans share stories about other living veterans (LO, DS, JQ, GJ, JA, MM) and their beloved friends who have passed (TO, SS). Their remembrances are flashes of light. They provide a new perspective on obstacles and wisdom/guidance for the long winding journey of life.

I have learned what one remembers lives again. Commitment, trust, humor, purpose, courage, love, resiliency, perseverance ... They were young soldiers forty years ago, life has changed and transformed many times over, but the virtues live. The cycle returns, create with what you have. I remembered and I found peace. Peace is not something I can hold tight in my hands. For me, it lives in the commitment to remember and the ability to pass it on to another.

Create With What You Have

2009-09-15T12:51:00.000-07:00

I have the statement, "create with what you have" pinned on my idea board. If you possess a steadfast commitment to your purpose or vision, do you have a solid foundation from which to create?

Create with commitment. Does that change your perspective? (It shifted mine.)

The Matter of Creation

2009-09-14T11:14:00.000-07:00

Something I'm considering this week ... the most essential element of creation is commitment.

Remember...

2009-09-10T07:01:00.000-07:00

From the foreword* in RESURGAM:

Remember
You are the hands of the present generation.
You hold the hands of a future generation.
You hold the hands of past generations, some now departed,
and they in turn held the hands of older generations.
Hearts that once beat with life still beat in remembrance.

Now that the book is out in the world (although a limited number of preview copies), I see the bigger pricture and interconnectedness. RESURGAM began as a "speck of light in the darkness," one man's attempt to honor his buddies that were unknown soldiers to me. I learned about the soldiers, and now due to RESURGAM, I am hearing from them and learning more.

The behind-the-scenes back stories are important. They tell the living story of remembrance that grows stronger with each connection. My goal moving forward is to share some of these stories here in Navigating by Stars and to highlight the importance of community and reaching out to others.

*Foreword from RESURGAM Standing on the Ground of Remembrance by Jean A. Niedert © 2008
NOTE: This is my first shared post for both blogs.

Possibility

2009-09-02T14:16:00.001-07:00

To borrow a line from Emily Dickinson, "I dwell in possibility." Today's morning writing reaped a bounty.
The original plan for book 2 has nearly been thrown out. It's liberating to let parts go and watch a new story unfold.

Three Soldiers

2009-09-01T11:38:00.000-07:00

In the past month three soldiers have stepped into my awareness. This in itself is not a surprise considering they are in RESURGAM. I know their identities and their roles in Alpha Company. I know the panel number and line for each one of them. When the first soldier stepped into my writer’s awareness I didn’t question “Why?” I stopped and paid attention. When the two other soldiers followed behind him, I wondered, “Why those three?” I didn’t resist the idea of their appearance and allowed the story to unfold. I didn’t expect I'd ever write about them because RESURGAM was complete. But know this, when the creative muse visits without any prompting, you pay attention, enjoy the ride and write.

Why those three?
I had forgotten their roles. Even though I knew their roles, in the clutteredness of details and distractions in today’s world, I forgot a simple fact: They were the platoon leaders of Alpha Company. It took someone else to help me remember.

The Tapping of the Heart

2009-09-01T10:24:00.000-07:00

Today I opened Macrina Wiederkehr's book Seven Sacred Pauses for an entirely different reason, but caught sight of the section header, "Breathing Spells for the Soul." It caught my attention and I stopped to read it.

She tells the story about the Kalahari bushmen that some Westerners hired to guide them through the Kalahari Desert. "Not being used to moving at the pace their employees were expecting, the bushmen suddenly sat down to rest and no amount of persuasion could induce the bushmen to move." The bushmen tried to explained the need for rest. They had to wait for their souls to catch up."
The Kalahari bushman called this ancient knowing “the tapping of the heart. ”The bushmen honored the natural pace and rhythm of their inner beings. They are able to pick up signals drawing them into a stance of obedient listening."

The "tapping of the heart" reminded me of a story I read last week. Whereas the Kalahari bushmen feel it on the inside, it seems in the modern western world there may be times when those closest to us, or maybe those wise enough to know, help us remember our heart. Sometimes we forget to listen, to be silent, and to respond to the tapping of the heart.

SOURCE: Seven Sacred Pauses - Living Mindfully Through the Hours of the Day
by Macrina Wiederkehr, page 22

Stargazing

2009-08-31T18:05:00.000-07:00

I was searching for images of the sky by Amedee Guillemin (specificallly an image of "Le Ciel"). Two clicks off my Guillemin search, I found these photos: The Milky Way over Glacier Point, Yosemite National Park and The Milky Way over Yosemite Valley.

The photos are just a preview from Stars Above, Earth Below , which documents Tyler Nordgren's journey to twelve national parks. "Astronomer and physics professor Tyler Nordgren took a journey across the American landscape, exploring the connections between the parks and the night sky. He visited twelve national parks in twelve months. Through it all, he enjoyed the uniquely dark skies that grace most national parks, a resource that is quickly vanishing from the rest of the country."

"One unintended consequence of the national parks is that while they protected the natural landscape from the rise of development and industrialization over the last 150 years, they also protected the night sky from the light pollution. Picture the star-filled night sky (with planets, nebulae, clusters, and Milky Way) as a natural landscape, and you quickly realize that in the 21st century it is as rare for a child to enjoy this wilderness on a nightly basis, as it is for them to see grizzly bears, glaciers, geysers and canyons from their front door step."

La Stella = The Star

2009-08-31T17:51:00.000-07:00

The inspiration for LaStella Group came from the Italian word "La Stella" (the star).

The word, La Stella (the star), has been pinned on my idea board for years. Waiting for me to finally see it and experience an Aha! moment of recognition.

It seems there are a lot of those moments in a lifetime: of waiting and searching, of moving through transitions, and finally "seeing" the answer. Then the adventure begins again because you know more and understand better! Lifelong learning is lifelong discovery. This is LaStella Group.

Happy Mirth Day!

2009-08-28T09:47:00.000-07:00

A perfect remembrance to celebrate life!
There are no presents to buy or tasks to do
only joy, laughter and silliness to share.

Happy Mirth Day!
the first ever!
(Thanks JD for taking a fun idea and creating Mirth Day!)

Tumbling Mirth

2009-08-27T07:36:00.000-07:00

When I first heard about Mirth Day, my memory connected the word "tumbling" to"mirth" and I remembered the poem High Flight. The beginning:
"Oh, I have slipped the surly bonds of earth,
And danced the skies on laughter silvered wings
sunward I've climbed and joined the tumbling mirth...

Read the entire poem: High Flight by John Gillespie Magee, Jr.
What I experience in the words: Laughter. Joy. Wonder. Freedom.
How about you?

Laughter and Levity

2009-08-26T12:22:00.000-07:00

Friday is the first annual Mirth Day... I heard about it last week from its creator, Jack Dillard. It's a grassroot effort. To spread the word and help people prepare, here's the website: Happy Mirth Day

The proposed petition on the home page made me laugh, here's an excerpt:
August is the only month without a major holiday (Independence Day), semi-major (St. Patrick’s Day), or even a minor one (Groundhog Day). Is that fair?
Imagine the disappointment of children born in August who suffered through their birth month without celebrating something bigger than themselves.
Now you can do something to help heal the scars: champion National Mirth Day, an annual day of celebration of laughter and levity on the last Friday in August.
August is the birth month of great American humorists, comedians and cartoonists, including Garrison Keillor, Lucille Ball, Gary Larson, Jack Black, Denis Leary, and many others.
...who doesn’t like to laugh?

PHOTO: Used with permission. Copyright 2009 Jack Dillard.

Enjoying the Ride?

2009-08-25T18:16:00.000-07:00

Ever feel like the surfer in this video? Video (1.29 min): Surfing Maui Jaws

Chaos

2009-08-24T12:56:00.000-07:00

What often rises up during transition is chaos (disorder, confusion, turmoil). The usual routine, structure and order fall away. If we become rigid and inflexible to the change, (resist it), and try to keep everything secure and predictable, it seems we suffer even more.

I've been navigating through the transition (the liminal period) for a character (Sophy). To best explain the situation is to use the backcover content from RESURGAM: "Remember them" echoes through every generation and against the standing stones of history. The two words transform into a presence that enters Sophy's awareness, directs her attention to the darkness, and whispers, "Go there." She went there in RESURGAM and I (the writer) had no clue how to move her out of "there." I thought I had to have the answer before I began writing this part. That was not the case. Sophy showed me (the writer) the way out. It's been exhilarating because I finally know the answer to a particular situation. The unfolding was nothing like what I expected.

In the time from when I began writing the war story, which has transformed into a peace story, I have learned from the characters. They have the answers. Instead of resisting the places they want to take the writer, I have learned how to trust them and not fight the movement. This has been an twenty year learning experience - trust the creative flow (even when it leads to the unknown) and go with the unexpected twists and turns.

Transitions - Continued

2009-08-24T09:37:00.001-07:00

If you stop to think about it, aren't we are always in some type of transition? The difference is the magnitude of the transition, and the perceived space and time between the two points. Usually the short transitions are easy to overlook and to accept. It's the transitions where the amount of time and space between the two points are unknown that are most difficult.

Why am I still writing about transitions? I've been facing the task of writing a character through a transition with unknowns, and as a writer, I don't know exactly what will transpire or how much time it will take. I get to dive into the great abyss of unknowing and write the story.

Transitions

2009-08-21T11:29:00.001-07:00

Advice my yoga teacher often says during class, "Be conscious of your transitions."
Apply it to yoga, to life, and to the liminal period.

No Man's Land

2009-08-20T11:04:00.001-07:00

Working on a chapter that deals with No Man's Land. Being the info-collector, I googled No Man's Land to see if there's something more to uncover.

I discovered liminality, which relates to individuals undergoing a role transformation (in the context of social position). It's the between time - the transition that occurs when someone leaves an old role yet hasn't assumed a new role. Liminality most often applies to coming of age milestones (such as graduation) or marriage. There are three stages:
1. separation
2. liminal period
3. reassimilation

With over a 9.4% unemployment rate for July, over 5 million people are in employment limbo, separated from their former roles. They're living in a liminal period. It seems like another form of No Man's Land. Just something to note for reference.

From What is liminality? by Charles La Shure: liminality is a midpoint between a starting point and an ending point, and as such it is a temporary state that ends when the initiate is reincorporated into the social structure.

Cultivating Meaning

2009-08-19T10:09:00.000-07:00

David Mas Masumoto writes in his new book, "I farm stories."

I see writing in terms of farming and gardening. I'm in the group of writers that works the ground, so to speak. We plow fields of imagination, remembrance and fact. We work with, or respond to, different seasons and unexpected weather. We're keenly aware of the subtleties of life and death. We uncover the details that others miss and face truths that others prefer to avoid. We deal uncertainty and fallow ground, and find hope in the sprouting seedlings and gentle blossoms that will bear fruit. We celebrate our harvest and share the fruits of our labor. We create and sustain community in unexpected ways that we can't even imagine during the process.

I don't farm the same stories that Masumoto does, his main story is about peaches and the true life of a peach farmer. As for me, now that I have space to see, I've been farming the ground of remembrance for over twenty years. Others have entrusted me with their life stories. I take the time to learn, see how the pieces of past and present interrelate and connect, and plant meaning for the future. This has been my "side occupation," and now I think it needs to be my main purpose.

The Perfect Peach

2009-08-18T14:23:00.000-07:00

If you've flown USAirways in August, you may have read the excerpt from Wisdom of the Last Farmer: Harvesting Legacies from the Land by David Mas Masumoto in the US Airways Magazine. Masumoto is an organic farmer cultivating peaches, nectarines and grapes near Fresno, CA.

Read the excerpt from US Airways magazine.

Here's a taste, which will have you 1) wanting to eat a peach, 2) clicking "read the excerpt."

From Wisdom of the Last Farmer: Harvesting Legacies from the Land by David Mas Masumoto:
With the first perfect peach of that season, I rediscovered my passion. I renewed my calling to save the living legacy of great heirlooms and to communicate their histories through flavors and traditions from one generation to the next. Every season finds me continuing to search for perfection. On the surface, it’s the feel of the peach. The first smell. The initial bite as flavor explodes in my mouth. The sound and swallow. The second wave of flavor as the aftertaste settles on taste buds. But the peach itself and all its wonderful, unique attributes are only the surface. Each peach represents the fruition of many right actions, each is a story in itself.

More info on the Masumoto farm.

Roadside Surprise

2009-08-17T16:29:00.001-07:00

When I first heard about the little roadside chapel, I envisioned a small stone chapel built in the early 1900s. The paved road turned into a gravel road, and the turn off was a dirt road guarded by an open cattle gate. We missed it on the first pass (and saw three deer running through a corn field as we drove on looking for a place to turn around). I wondered what we would find in this hidden, seemingly desolate place surrounded by cornfields and trees. We parked the car, and walked a dirt path to the chapel.

It wasn't the quaint stone chapel I envisioned, but we were surprised when we entered the little space. The six stained glass windows told a story. Two Bible verses were noted in two windows on the right side of the chapel. Micah 4:3-4 and Isaiah 2:4. The center window on the right side of the chapel, was a banner "Peace" above Christ.

We were curious about the Bible verses, so we looked at the open Bible on the altar. The verses were conveniently marked. Both said close to the same thing: He shall judge between the nations and shall arbitrate for many peoples; they shall beat their swords into plowshares, and their spears into pruning hooks; nations shall not lift up sword against nation, neither shall they learn war anymore.

It's called the Guardian Angel Roadside Chapel but inside the warm oak chapel the message received was peace.

Midwest Roots

2009-08-13T18:04:00.000-07:00

The farms and towns of Iowa have their own stories to tell.
I listen. I love the stories in the Midwest.

Sapientia

2009-08-12T09:49:00.000-07:00

Sapientia is Latin for "tasting knowledge."
Thomas Keating writes, "It is like the experience of tasting fruit, a very different experience from reading about it in a dictionary."
Wikipedia defines sapientia as wisdom and discernment.

Au Revoir To All That

2009-08-10T15:11:00.000-07:00

Found a book, Au Revoir To All That - Food, Wine, and the End of France by Michael Steinberger. The introduction pulled me in.
Resonated with this on page 3: "I went to France as a thirteen-year-old with my parents... I experienced the Great Awakening - the moment at the table that changes entirely one's relationship to food..."

Page 4: "France became not just the place that fed me better than any other, but an emotional touchstone. In low moments, nothing lifted my mood like the thought of Paris - the thought of eating in Paris, that is."

Page 5 as he begins writing about the decline of food in France. "It was the swift and unexpected demise of Laduree just after the turn of the millennium that caused the first Doubts to creep in."

Laduree?! My last day in Paris (after returning from Verdun) included a visit to Laduree. Steinberger enjoyed Laduree's praline mille feuille. (Be sure to click the mille feuille photo.)
His description: "ethereal napoleon consisting of almond pralines, praline cream, caramelized pastry dough and crispy hazelnuts. "Of all the things that I routinely ate in France, it was the praline mille feuille that made me the happiest."

At the end of the book Steinberger provides his discovery at Pierre Herme - the 2000 Feuilles. His description: "the pastry was so impossibly light and flaky that I half feared it might float into the next arrondissement if I didn't hold it tight, but what flavor it packed. This was the Platonic form of a praline mille feuille, so delicious that I immediately called my wife..."

Yes, I focused on the sweet stuff. But the book reveals the obstacles and what goes on 'behind the scenes' of cultivating food, wine, three star restaurants and McDonalds in France.

(The second best thing to enjoying a meal is reading about a great one in descriptive detail. Throughout the book Michael Steinberger did not disappoint. You wish you were sitting at the table with him.)

Completed Draft

2009-08-07T06:47:00.000-07:00

The Christmas story that arrived on the stormy night is now a completed draft. It's a new chapter in the new book. It's nothing that I expected to be in the new 'peace' book.

The past week has proven "Let go of how you thought your life should be" is good advice. If I had a paying work project last week, I would not have been able to write this chapter. Instead of worrying "I should be working...", I just wrote. I didn't resist or worry about writing a scene that takes place in the context of war. What brought me to this point of acceptance is Alpha Company and the generous responses I have received from them.

The characters were living on the page. The action had me wondering "what happens next?" and I took one step at a time to learn the answer. It's done!

An Ocean of Words

2009-08-05T15:31:00.000-07:00

My yoga teacher, Sarah, spoke these words in yoga class: "An ocean of compassion." It was easy to visualize the soothing, shimmering image.

A day earlier I had written to a writer friend, "I'm swimming in an ocean of words," since I was so deep into writing the Christmas story. The ocean of words transforming into an ocean of compassion stuck with me during the day. The surface is soothing. But what you pull from the depth of compassion is sensitivity. Sensitivity lets you see both the joy and wonder, but also the sorrow, pain and suffering. Sensitivity gives you the power to be gentle and strong.

So, back the two playing hopscotch in The First Snow. My first reaction was why can't they see the joy in the moment? Those jaded boys! But what's so compassionate about that? What if you can't even see an ordinary day? Some are weary, downtrodden, or maybe trapped in a self-made ditch (similar to a bolgia*). They cannot see wonder even if its standing in front of them, with a sign identifying JOY & WONDER! What then? Compassion, but don't expect anything in return.

*bolgia - ditch from Dante's Inferno

Joy and Wonder

2009-08-04T07:13:00.000-07:00

Joy and wonder - it's expressed on their faces and in their open arms. It's about receiving and welcoming. Of enjoying and experiencing the transformation of ordinary into something extraordinary. Of course, not everyone sees it or receives it - as the photo shows. There, amidst the outward displays wonder, are the ones still looking down and playing hopscotch. It's within their reach, but for whatever reason, they continue in the ordinary day.
Better view of "The First Snow"

SOURCE: Fotofolio Cards
“The First Snow”
Photo by Vladimir Zotov

Shedding Some Light

2009-08-03T13:45:00.000-07:00

What arrived on the night of stormy weather was a Christmas story. (Literally the action begins on Christmas Eve.)

The next day I received a package in the mail. The package included a letter, two books and other significant writing. As I read through everything, for me it was Christmas in July. What a priceless gift discovered in the words I received. And yet, there was more. In the handwritten letter was a "make you pause in quiet wonderment" connection to the story that fell on the paper on Tuesday night.

An ordinary day becomes extraordinary. The story continues...